CORNY And now, broadcast live in front of a live studio audience. For the first time from the certified up-to-code WYBT studio it's The Corny Collins Miss Hairspray Spectacular...
COUNCIL GIRLS He's Corny!!
CORNY ...brought to you by Ultra Clutch Hairspray!
CORNY (& ENSEMBLE) What gives a girl Power and punch? Is it charm, is it poise? No, it's hairspray!
What gets a gal Asked out to lunch Is it brains, is it dough? No, it's hairspray!
If you take a ride With no can at your side Then your flip will be gone With the wind
But if you spray it and lock it, You can take off in a rocket And in outer space Each hair will be in place
Why take a chance When you get up and dance If you twist, i insist You use hairspray
And tell your mother Her head she should smother With "ultra-clutch" faithfully
So if you're a redhead, A blonde or brunette Just take my advice And you might just get The only thing better than hairspray
CORNY That's me!
ENSEMBLE Ska-doo-dle-e-ya Doo-dle-e-ya do wah
CORNY Forget the milkman The only thing better than hairspray
ENSEMBLE Hairspray! Wow!
CORNY That's me!
CORNY & ENSEMBLE What makes a man Reach out and touch? Ultra clutch!
CORNY & ENSEMBLE So if you're a redhead, A blonde or brunette Just take my advice And you might just get
CORNY The only thing better than hairspray That's me!
ENSEMBLE Ska-doo-dle-e-ya Doo-dle-e-ya do wah
COUNCIL GIRLS He's Corny Collins!
CORNY The only thing better than hairspray
ENSEMBLE Hairspray! Wow!
CORNY That's me!
ENSEMBLE Ska-doo-dle-e-ya do wah Ska-doo-dle-e-ya do wah! Do wow!
CORNY "Hey, baby, you look like you could use a stiff one!"
BRENDA Ska-doo-dle-e-ya-do do wah!!!!
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